Just Play Along
by Arctic Blossoms
Summary: When Inuyasha tells his young new girlfriend that he is a divorced family man to cover up the scam he uses to pick up girls, Kagome is in for a real surprise when he asks her and her children to play his ex-wife and kids
1. Difficult Beginnings

**Title: Playing Along**

**Rated: T **

**Genres: Romance, Humour**

**Summary: When Inuyasha tells his young new girlfriend that he is a divorced family man to cover up the scam he uses to pick up girls, Kagome is in for a real surprise when he asks her and her children to play his ex-wife and kids**

**Hey this is my new and first ever Inuyasha fanfiction, it's going to be based a bit on "Just Go With it" You know that film with, Jennifer Anniston, Adam Sandler? Anyway before you start, Whura is a mixture of Whore and Yura so pronounced Hura yeah. Feel free to point out any mistakes you see to me. Flame is you really want to, you know I feed off of flames since they point out the mistakes your story has in a blunt way and I like that, it helps me improve.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha, Characters you recognise or any scenes you recognise from "Inuyasha" "Just go with it" or any other anime you've seen, scenes from some Animes may be or are purely coincidental and belong to their rightful owners.**

**So right now I'm slow dancing with my beautiful albeit a little tipsy wife Kagome at my wedding. Thinking about how this all started. Well lets go back to my first almost wedding. Where I came up with this amazing back story to score hit chicks, at my wedding? Read and you'll get what I mean. I was **_**supposed **_**to get married a bitch named Kinkyho and her bridesmaids from hell Slagura, Whura and Kalbino, well their real names were Kikyo, Kagura, Yura and Kanna but that's beside the point.**

**Anyways, I was 18 and in love fresh out of highschool, when an interesting conversation brought me from the altar to the room of my 'lovely' bride to be, Kikyo.**

"I'm so happy you picked this dress, Kikyo!" **Slagura smiled.**  
"Yeah…You look beautiful." **That pale Kalbino had chimed in solemnly.**

"Doesn't she?" **Slagura said dreamily**  
"You guys, I'm getting married! I'm getting married!" **Kinkyho giggled girlishly**  
"Not without your veil, you're not silly. It's tradition!" **Rin exclaimed** "Ugh. _Now _Where is it?"  
"Oh, I think I left it upstairs." **Kinkyho feigned fake innocence which Rin would've seen through if she wasn't so excited**  
"Don't worry. I'll get it," Rin paused "Sis" **She grinned, rushing up the stairs to retrieve the missing veil. That was Rin for ya, helpful and hyper. Seven though she had been nice on that day she had still warned me about that bitch Kikyo**  
"She is so annoying." **That two faced whore Kinkyho had said after Rin left.**  
"Isn't she? And so ugly." **Slagura complained laughing.**  
"She looks like an eight year old, and don't get me started on her figure, it's virtually non-existent" Yura added, **The slut probably just loved slaggine people off behind her backs, no-one talks about Rin like that and I'll have you know I ripped her a new one after embarrassing Kikyo at the altar**  
"I know! and she's gonna be my sister-in-law in an hour!" **Kinkyho sighed applying more make up to her ugly face, making it even more grotesque**

**Kalbino was silent during the whole exchange, I still wonder why**  
"How are you gonna deal with that?" Yura asked  
"I'm just gonna lay down the law for my little _Yashie-poo_." **She smirked** "We're seeing that weird demon family of his as little as possible." **God how had I thought I was in love with that thing, most embarrassing thing ever like ew**  
"You sure he's gonna go along with that?" **Kagura asked admiring herself in the mirror, what a self centred hoe.**  
"Inuyasha doesn't say no to me. Believe me, I've had well trained since _middle school_."  
"So, tell us, what happened with Naraku last night?" **Yura asked eagerly while Kalbino and Slagura probably inwardly groaned. Naraku was their creepy cousin that had some weird infatuation with Kikyo since forever, still can't believe I didn't see she was cheating on me with that greasy bastard.  
**"So, I told him if he wanted to stop the wedding, he had to speak now or forever hold his peace." Kikyo started annoyed "And guess what that creepy bastard said?"  
"_'I'm never gonna settle down Kikyo. You can marry that half-breed of yours knowing you could've had a real Demon'_ But God as he said it, he was so hot! I melted right there and then" **Kikyo said fanning herself. Words can't describe how disgusting that was**  
"So did he give you a wedding present, huh?" **Whura asked, I swear she was some kind of sex freak, and not the good kind either**  
"Jesus Yura! You're so horny!" **Slagura teased**

"Yeah. He did. I guess you could call it that anyway." **I don't think she felt remorseful**  
"You're so bad!" **Whura laughed, and it was so ugly my ears had drooped at the time and they still do!**  
"It's the last time, I swear." **Kinkyho had said no sincerity in her voice what so ever**  
"Yeah, right!" **Slagura grinned.**

"But Inuyasha is so cute and protective, And he's gonna be an archaeologist. So, I'm marrying him and those weird cosplay doggy thingies on his head. Maybe I could get him to turn human for me? He'd look better. I'm dreading tonight, I bet you he won't be as good as Naraku. Or all my other secret lovers!" **Kinkyho exclaimed as she literally cackled.**  
"Close your eyes when he's on top!" **Whura laughed she was on the floor where trash lik her belonged **

"And your thighs, don't worry faking an orgasm won't be that hard guys, he's so much of a virgin he probably doesn't know what one is!"** The whole group had fallen about laughing, well except for Kalbino who was void of emotion and my own sister in law Rin who was busy upstairs.  
You know at first, from the altar. I had thought my almighty "Cosplay doggy thingies" as Kinkyho had put it had been deceiving me, Kikyo had, had her bad points but to cheat on me? My anger had long since faded and I had given a bitter sweet smile. I guess I had expected that from a two cent whore like her, well deep down anyway. I'd turned around to face Miroku, my best man.**

"Inuyasha, I'm so sorry." **He had said**  
**Can't say it was the best night of my life, more like embarrassin**g. **But basically that was me, Inuyasha Takahashi at 18. Pathetic, huh?  
So, I was halfway done boozing away my sorrows,** **when something pretty interesting happened. This really stunning bombshell works in pissed and gorgeous and loads of lecherous comments being thrown at her by sleazy guys, you know the usual**  
"Oh, baby, you're like a Pop Tart, hot and sweet!"  
"Hey, mami!"  
"You must play the trumpet or something,  
'cause you're making me feel all horny and stuff!" **That one didn't even make much sense to me. The lady sat next to me at the bar, and I noticed she had dropped her purse**  
"You dropped your purse." **I had said to her**  
"Can I just sit for 10 seconds and not get hit on? Thank you." **Did this lady even listen**  
"I was just letting you know you dropped your purse." **I kind of snapped at her.**  
"I'm sorry. I thought..." **She said her blue eyes glancing at my ring. Which I for some reason had kept on**

"That's fine, that's fine." **Remembering why I was her as her eyes lingered on my ring**  
"I'm sure you didn't meet the lady who gave you that ring in a dodgy market like this." **She giggled, hm she had been cute.**  
"School cafeteria." **I told her**  
"How long you been married?" **She'd asked me**  
**I was gonna tell her, I really was. But I didn't want her to know what a loser I was, so I stretched the truth a little.**  
"Six years." She'd **nodded at my response so I'd guessed that she'd bought it.**  
"Where's your wife tonight?" **The girl had asked**  
"I stopped asking that question a long time ago." **I responded putting as much hurt and upset in my voice as I could, which wasn't hard considering what had gone down that night**  
"Aw. That's terrible." **She said to me sympathy lacing her voice.**  
"My wife says I work too much." **I started **"Trying to provide for her, her shopping addiction," **I paused a little as if contemplating whether to tell her this secret or not, it was a small pause though, the girl was a little tipsy at this point so she wouldn't have thought much of it anyways** "and crack." **I added. The words I had said weren't too convincing but my tone of voice had been.**  
"Why don't you just leave her?" **The girl asked**  
"The children." I said "My poor children. All 14 of them." I added making sure to have my voice crack.  
"I just, I like to adopt," **I said **"and I don't wanna stop doing that." **I knew then that I totally had gift for this.**  
"You poor guy. You wanna get outta here?" She had smiled and grabbed my hand flirtatiously S**o I discovered the power of the wedding ring. The symbol of my humiliation had become a tool to get back on the horse**.  
**I switched my specialty from archaeology to plastic surgery, and the ring became my thing.**

**Lets flash forward 18 years and into another bar, with some other hopeless girl that would fall for my act.**  
"I just assumed after we got married she'd stop hooking, but..." **I looked her in the eye. Bingo! I was **_**sooo**_** getting laid tonight. The girl took my hand and placed it on her chest, how forward I mused.  
**"You need to put this wedding band on a true heart." **She said. Corny I know but she was hot.**  
"This is a good moment." **I said, winning quote guys, take note of this, and ladies stop calling me a pig already**.  
"Yeah. Should we go make it last, for a while, somewhere?" **She proposed breathless**  
"Okay, let's go. To your dorm." I agreed  
**Sometimes I think about throwing the ring into the ocean. I know how wrong it is, using it like this I mean. But I can't. I can never throw this baby away. It's my Precious. Besides, being fake married is the perfect way to make sure I never get my heart broken again.**

**A/N: That's the first chapter done! I don't have much to say apart from review! And sorry I haven't updated my other stories, I can't update if you kill me so put down your weapons please!**

**Yours,**

**Blossom**


	2. Enter, Ayumi

**Title: Playing Along**

**Rated: T **

**Genres: Romance, Humour**

**Summary: When Inuyasha tells his young new girlfriend that he is a divorced family man to cover up the scam he uses to pick up girls, Kagome is in for a real surprise when he asks her and her children to play his ex-wife and kids**

**A/N**: **Well hello there my darlings, I'm back again, and this time with over 6 pages and 2k+ words in dialogue and Kagome and her children finally introduced *stares into camera* it's personal. Anyway, There's no more Inuyasha POV in bold like in the last chapter because that was only a flashblack/intro. Anyways happy Reading!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha, Characters you recognise or any scenes you recognise from "Inuyasha", "Just go with it" or any other anime you've seen, scenes from some Animes may be or are purely coincidental and belong to their rightful owners.**

* * *

"What are these?" Kagome asked the worker snappily at the delivery guy, as she examined bags filled with a murky brown liquid and then placed them back into the box.  
"Boobie bags." He answered in a foreign accent "The women, they stick them in their flat chesties, make them big."  
"Yes, but these are _not _the boobie bags that I ordered! What is that? It's like a syrup dispenser at an IHOP. Full of this weird liquid. How are we even supposed to use these come on, I don't know even what these are they're disgusting. Come on. These…" She said touching her own chest "They don't feel like these." The clerk tried also to test for himself but was shot down  
"No! Seriously?" Kagome exclaimed  
"I just trying to learn." The delivery guy responded with his best sheepish grin  
"Listen, Manten, Dr. Takahashi would never accept subpar boobs. Fake, or other wise. Would you please just get me what I ordered and tell Hiten that I would like a discount for the inconvenience?" Kagome told him tiredly  
"Yes, ma'am." Manten said as he was leaving

"Thank you, Manten" Kagome said as she flipped through her clipboard and greeted a patient.  
"My 4:00 here?" Inuyasha asked, as he saw Kagome pop her head in through the door of his office

"Yeah." Kagome answered him "Jodie Knight. I sent her to room six, and please" She let out a small chuckle "just don't laugh"

"Well, I, uh... I had bad plastic surgery." Jodie started as Inuyasha and Kagome disguised their laughter with coughs.  
"Should've known this doctor was a quack." She carried on, not taking notice of the very unprofessional pair. The woman, Jodie had one eyebrow permanently raised the other lowered and her mouth was stretched in a weird kind of grimace

"His office was in, like, a warehouse." Jodie said, fidgeting with her fingers.  
"I see, I see. Any questions ma'am…um…Jodie?  
"No, no. Just, please help me, Doctor." The lady sighed  
"All righty then." Inuyasha smirked rubbing his hands together "It's usually easier  
to do these things right the first time, but...What? You seem dubious." Inuyasha smiled referring to her problem.  
"Hmm?" She hummed , not noticing his joke whilst Kagome had already excused herself to laugh at it in the corridor "Oh, no, no. I hear you're the best, Dr. Takahashi. You have my complete trust" Jodie beamed at him, well tried to considering her predicament.  
"Well of course I'm the best, and I'm certain we can figure something out here. So just relax. Mrs Knight." Jodie tried as best she could to relax her face but it ended up worse.

"That's relaxed? Hmm." Inuyasha said  
"Here, let me just try to pull them down for a sec." Inuyasha said moving her eyebrow and lips to what they would have been if not for the faulty plastic surgery.  
"Aaaand I let goo… Okay, shoots right back up there." Inuyasha said, Kagome hearing this exchange from her place in the corridor and guessing what was going on just laughed quietly.  
"I'm sorry." Jodie apologised.

"Oh? Sorry about what?" Inuyasha asked as he took notes.  
"Oh, my God! It's just..." Jodie whined  
"That just really went right up there. That was high. You gotta watch that. It's gonna get caught in your hair." Inuyasha said probing her face again as Kagome entered back in, convinced she was going to be professional from now on  
"I don't know, maybe I should just keep it like this." Jodie sighed "It really seems to make other people happy."  
"No. But, seriously," Kagome started gaining everyone's attention, a silence filled the room "are you available for my kid's birthday party?" She and Inuyasha burst out laughing  
"That's too much. I'm sorry!" Kagome exclaimed, "I'm sorry let me give you a hug." She said  
"Yeah. That's what you need first. We'll fix this." Inuyasha agreed as they trapped her in a group hug.  
"Mmm. Oh, God! Okay, I gotta... I'm gonna excuse myself. I'm sorry." Kagome said, being too close to them eyebrows just wasn't good for her, they were probably sucking her professionalism away  
"Hey Kagome! Will you do me the honour of bear-"  
"Miroku's here!" Kagome yelled skilfully cutting him off, years of practice

" Hey lech! We're in here" Inuyasha yelled back. Miroku walked into the room and was about to stroke a beautiful backside until she turned around.  
"Oh. Oh, my gosh. Facial confusion over here." Miroku joked, certainly not expecting that, this was a plastic surgery but couldn't she just have over sized boobs or something?  
"Will you do me the honour of bearing my child?" Miroku asked getting down on one knee and stroking Jodie's backside  
"Well. Very flattered young man, but actually I'm married"  
"Oh, browch. My gosh. Look, I don't know who you're seeing, but whoever they are, they don't have what this guy's got."  
"All right, 'Roku." Kagome said  
"Down there?" Jodie asked warily

"Wha-No-"

"Yeah, it's a very good one. I should know, I installed it." Inuyasha smirked cutting him off  
"Oh, you had a penile enlargement?"  
"What-N-" Miroku was cut off again as Inuyasha answered for him.

"Yes"  
"People really do that? That is hilarious! See you on the 28th, Dr. Takahashi!" Jodie laughed as she left  
"INUYASHAAAA!" Miroku whined  
"Why do you keep telling people this. Every time. They're lies and you know it"  
"You don't think Kagome believes this?" Miroku pondered  
"Kagome would have been in the room if I did that. She probably would have held the magnifying glass." Inuyasha answered  
"Yeah. And the tweezer." Kagome added  
"You guys are so mean." Miroku whined

* * *

"Hey, Jakotsu. Yo, yo." Inuyasha called Jakotsu one of his acquaintances (Having Jak as a friend would just be too creepy) who just happened to be a plastic surgery addict, and the host of this party.  
"Inu-honey! I am so happy you could be here! How are you, baby? Did you bring any Botox?"  
"I didn't bring the Botox." Inuyasha replied "However I brought my best friend, Miroku."  
"Nice to meet you, Miroku." Jak said, eyes glued onto Inuyasha  
"Is this a Halloween party?" Miroku murmured knowing Inuyasha's sensitive ears would pick them up.  
"Are you kidding me right now? You got more work done, didn't you?  
"Yeah, just a little bit, just tweaking, tweaking. Maintenance, maintenance." Jakotsu responded  
"I just wanna stay in the game, Inu-baby."  
"You need stop, Jak. It's no good for you." Inuyasha lectured him as he patted his face  
"Do you have any feeling in your face?" He asked examining it thoroughly  
"Just in this one spot right here." Jak answered as he pointed to a tiny spot just above his eyebrow with his pinky. "And then from the eyebrows down, dead, dead." Jak said as he let out a sound that sounded like an otter, and seal being run over by two cars with squeaky tyres at the same time, but obviously we can't be sure that it sounded like that as no one has ever heard that before, but if somebody had then they would think of Jak's laugh.  
"Why's he making that noise?" Asked Miroku seriously concerned for Jakostu's well being  
"He's laughing, It's just messed up because of Plastic surgery"

" Oh, okay." Miroku said, uncomfortable.  
"So I wanted to go to your pally Dr. Yashie-kun here, but he refused to do any work." Jak said as he made that noise again. "Said he didn't wanna put his fingers in the pie. Ooh!" Jak exclaimed as he took a sip of a martini and it all dribbled back down his chin  
"It was getting dangerous. This amount...See!" Inuyasha said spotting the dribble  
"That shouldn't be happening right now." He said.  
"Jak! Jak, Jak, Jak!" A young man came rushing towards him  
"Shippo cut open his knee. It looks really bad hon, what should we do?." The man said to Jak  
"What happened? Settle, settle. What do you expect me to do about it?" Jak replied  
"It's bleeding. You know what? I could stitch him up. Why don't you go get me my bag? All right." Inuyasha said making his way to bathroom where Shippo would be waiting for him.

"So, you fell down the stairs, huh?" Inuyasha asked the kid, he was probably about 14-15 maybe?  
"Yeah." He replied somewhat dreamily  
"Okay. Did you trip over something? Was there a skateboard there, or..." Inuyasha trailed off as he did his soy medico stuff, you know, the usual.  
"No, I was distracted by something." Shippo answered  
"So what distracted you?" Inuyasha asked to keep himself busy, couldn't this kid at least give proper answers?  
"A girl." Inuyasha fake thought "A girl, okay. Was it your mother?"  
"No!" Shippo shouted in an 'eww gross' kind of way  
"'Cause she just looks good." Shippo looked at him weirdly "That's your stepmom. I can talk like that."  
"All right. This is lidocaine. Don't think about it." Inuyasha bumped him on the head  
"OW!" Shippo whined  
"Don't think about it. Think about your head."  
"Good, good." Inuyasha said finishing off  
"Blonde, brunette, redhead?" Inuyasha asked, now more to distract him than hold conversation  
"Raven hair, Cali tan, tall and rocking body." Shippo replied "Nipples." He added distracted again  
"Want me to numb something else for you?" Inuyasha chuckled  
"You're getting a little you know wink wink over there." Inuyasha smirked  
"No! No, I'm good. I'm good." Shippo said  
"I'm alive! I'm alive, everybody!" Shippo screamed throwing himself right back into the party which was in full swing by the way.  
"Good job, Doctor." A tall, tanned beautiful dark haired girl approached him "That was really nice." She added  
"So you made the poor boy fall?" Inuyasha chuckled "You're the distraction" He winked at her  
"The what?" She asked confused.  
"Shippo was distracted and now I really know why. But anyway that's why he fell. The distraction"  
"Sooo, I'm taking the rap for this?"  
"Yes. Your hotness basically pushed him down the stairs." Inuyasha teased  
"Good luck proving that in court, Atheniac." The girl laughed  
"Atheniac? Is that what they're saying on Greek Geek nowadays?" Inuyasha asked  
"I knew you two would eventually find each other!" Jak exclaimed as he approached the two.  
"But be careful, 'Yumi baby, these plastic surgeons, they really know how to operate."  
"Yeah, all right, Jakotsu. All right." Ayumi laughed  
"I just don't know about plastic surgery." Ayumi told Inuyasha "I mean, doesn't it always look so fake?" She asked  
"Depends who's doing it. I'm pretty good at it. I'm telling you. Some of my patients are here tonight."

"Oh, really?" She asked teasing him a little  
"Really, really. Look around, see if you can find someone hot." Inuyasha said looking around "Okay, decent looking" he added  
"Hey, what about that lady?" Ayumi asked/shrieked pointing at a platinum blonde with overly stretched lips and squinty eyes. The woman had pale skin and her lips were plastered with lipstick and eyes drowned in a failed black smokey eye  
"You mean the joker? Only over my dead body! I probably would've killed her" Inuyasha replied.  
"Fine." Sighed in defeat "Who did you do?" She asked, genuinely curious  
"All right. I'll whisper in your ear" Inuyasha said to her. "But only because of patient confidentiality, so don't get any ideas!" He smirked at her "Okay. Here goes, see that guy over there?" Inuyasha spoke softly in Ayumi's ear, gesturing towards the Adonis with dashing features and a prominent v line slowly stepping out of the pool, illuminated by an enchanting glow he shot a grin at the ladies by the pool and making all the girls faint  
"You mean sex on legs? You did him!? Damn! So the booty ain't real?" Ayumi asked disappointed.  
" Yep, Before I met him, he was No Ass Aaron." Inuyasha said to her chuckling at how Aaron used to look before he worked his magic.  
"Really?" Ayumi was shocked at the wonders of plastic surgery.  
"His back, chest and stomach used to go straight into his knees. Seriously, like he'd go out and from the side he used to mistaken as the rectangle from Mr Maker." Inuyasha joked.

* * *

"So, Mrs. Japan, how long have you lived here in LA? I've been here almost twenty years." Inuyasha recounted, as Ayumi and he walked down the semi moonlit beach.

"Wow" Ayumi sighed. "You must have a lot of experience with the celebs right? Being a _Plastic Surgeon_ and all," Ayumi told him smiling as he chuckled and gave her a "sure" "I've been here for 5 years at least." Ayumi answered Inuyasha

"Uh-huh. That's a lot of auditioning for you, little girl" Inuyasha teased. "Wanna be a big Hollywood star then?" He laughed.  
"You think I wanna be an actress?" Ayumi asked a smirk on her face  
"No. More like I'm 100% sure" Inuyasha said smiling at their intertwined hands  
"Well, guess again, Doc. I teach first graders." Ayumi informed him  
"They got no schools in Tokyo to teach at?" He joked  
"Actually after my parent split I followed my dreams of becoming a teacher here to the land of the free, where my parents couldn't bother me. They had a pretty nasty one and I wasn in the 8th grade going through some rough patches at the time so it took a toll on me, and as I got older I just got tired of picking sides, so..." Ayumi said looking at the ocean.

"Oh, I can only imagine how rough that must have been." Inuyasha said to her  
"Yeah. I thought I'd make a change and, yeah, move out to LA." Ayumi carried on, not really acknowledging Inuyasha's sentence of consolation  
"You came to the right place." Inuyasha joked "No one _ever_ gets divorced in LA." He teased.  
"Whatever, Inu." She giggled  
"I've never hung out with a girl your age. This is nice." Inuyasha told her softly  
"Oh, no. Your first lie to me." Ayumi giggled

"You're good. All right. I've never hung out with a girl your age and connected the way we are right now. Actually, I've never connected with, I don't think any girl at any age." Inuyasha looked up as he gave her as little of the truth as she needed to know.  
"See? I can tell when you're lying and when you're telling the truth." Ayumi giggled booping his nose

"Yeah well the second thing I said was the truth." Inuyasha told her grinning  
"I know." Ayumi giggled again (**ugh**) as she leaned forward to kiss him…

* * *

**A/N**** – Tried to make Ayumi as ditzy and annoying as possible (like she is the anime ugh) with out obviously bashing her or having her be too under developed as a person. What do you guys think? Don't kill me, it will be Inume, lets just get Inuyasha's shallow feeling for the shrieky Ayumi out of the way first. Sorry Miroku just disappeared, he will make an epic reappearance, tell me should I magic Sango into this too? Was this too much like the film? Is Inuyasha without Kagome disgusting you? Ugh me too but just drop ideas in your reviews because I'm working on the next chapter right now! So Review guys.**

**Yours, **

**Blossom**


End file.
